Top Three Reasons You Left The Mormon Church

This is a survey. If you consider yourself an active, faithful member of the LDS Church please do not comment on any of the responses unless you are seeking clarification, and then only seek clarification and no more. I will do the same. This is just for me to learn, although I may use what you say here in other posts on this site. I only want to hear from people who have been members of the LDS Church and have then left it. I would prefer to hear from those who have strong feelings about leaving and didn’t leave just because they were 8 and their parents left so they did too. If your feeling is that you would like to get other members of the LDS Church to leave it, so much the better for the purposes of this post. Feel free to response anonymously if you so desire, I don’t need to know who you are, I’m just interested in what you say.

As you compose your responses I would ask that you ask yourself this question: If had 30 seconds in an elevator with an Mormon, and that was the only chance I would have to start them down the road toward questioning their faith, what would I tell them? What books would I want them to read? What websites would I want them to visit? What articles would I want them to examine? What questions would I want them to think about?

Then, give me your best three (or less, or more, it’s all good).

Note: Please do not copy and paste the full text of articles or entire books here, or someone else’s lengthy diatribe. If you want to give a diatribe that’s fine, but let it be your own. Remember, this is what you would say if you only had 30 seconds, not what you would stuff into someone’s arms if you happened to be carrying around a bunch of anti-Mormon literature. People are more likely to listen to what you have to say if you’re brief and to the point. If you go on and on and on people will just skip over it, and I might just delete your inpute so as to not clutter things up.


  1. i been in the church since i was 8 and i learn that i have been decieved..its a false church false prophets it was about sex money and lyes,,joe wanted sex with all the wemen as often as he he said god told him to take many wieves.,.nice tight young girls were real good brigham uoung liked it to,,a veriety of pussys..very good

    • you are soooo full of shit.

  2. In the way you phrase the question, you seem to be assuming that those who have left would want others to question their faith, almost as if they would have the same missionary zeal for getting people out that most LDS folks have for getting people to join. I know a number of self-declared former Mormons that don't feel that way, and that seems like a big assumption, as if all former Mormons are actively anti-Mormon.

    • I apologize if that's how it came across. I know that's not how all ex-Mormons feel because some of my friends who have left the Church aren't that way at all, but for the purposes of this post I am more interested in getting responses from those who do feel strongly enough about the reasons they left the Church that they would actively engage others to leave as well, although any and all answers are welcome.

  3. I actually left and came back, so I'm not sure if I truly qualify, but I will give you some of the reasons that I cited at the time for leaving. Well, I'm sort of back, I'm not really active, but I do believe in the church.

    The first reason that I left the church was because I felt it was oppressive to women, and my husband at the time did nothing to dispel this notion. Even though he was not an active member, he used the church against me, stating that if I was a good Mormon wife, I would obey him no matter what. He also called in our bishop, counselors, home teachers, etc to try to force me to stay with him when I was wanting to leave him. He even used them to get custody of our children, even though prior to that, not only had he not gone to church himself, but had kept me from going as well. I harbored resentment for that for a long time, and I'm still not completely over it. However, when he was going and trying to get custody of the children, suddenly they were sure that he had made a complete turnaround, and that I was the devil incarnate. He even had his new wife baptized as soon as possible, and acting in the same hypocritical manner that he was, refusing to follow the word of wisdom, looking at porn, etc. I was hurt that this would be allowed, and that I was the one treated like a pariah.

    I also had a hard time when I was younger and when I married him in the first place, because I felt like the area in which I lived seemed to have more Sunday only Mormons, and I didn't want to be associated with those people. They cared more about appearances than anything else. They eve made up new rules for dances and such that were more appropriate to the FLDS sect than the mainstream, such as having to wear skirts that covered my knees when I didn't even own one that covered that much.

    I was also put off, and still have a difficult time with the black people not receiving the priesthood until they did. My husband is black, and anything I try to say to justify this, even if I've read it here or on another LDS website, sounds almost as hollow to my own ears as it does to his. I know I should take it on faith that there was a valid reason for this, but I just can't see any valid reason for discriminating against anyone at any time, and unfortunately, it seems as if we did, and I'm just not sure why or how to explain it.

    I'm not anti-mormon, or pro-mormon. I'm on the fence. I'm trying to find my faith, but I face many obstacles, and it's not easy.

    • Thanks Elaine for the response. I just have to comment on your statement regarding blacks and the priesthood where you said "I know I should take it on faith that there was a valid reason for this". I wonder if there was a valid reason. Could it have been a mistake, and yet the Church still be God's church? I don't have an opinion one way or the other because I don't know how the practice started nor why it continued as long as it did. Nobody seems to know for sure. Maybe it was a mistake, maybe it wasn't. For me, the faith comes in still believing that the Church is God's church, even though its members and leaders may at times make mistakes, even pretty big ones.

      • That's an interesting theory, and one that I have indeed pondered. I know that although it could very well be God's true church, it is still run by humans, and humans are indeed fallible, even the best of us.

        I do recall going to a Bible study course where I read a passage in the Bible stating that not a single one of us is perfect and that applies to church leaders as well. They still have their prejudices and ways of thinking that may not necessarily be 100% correct, but they seem to be right more often than not.

        • Yea, that belief will probably never change for me. Wait, what? I can't believe I even wrote that… Of course men are not 100% correct, that doesn't even need to be a belief. If men were already 100% there isn't a need for religion, or this trial that we're going through.

  4. I think that what it boiled down to for me was that one morning I woke up and realized that I did not want to spend the rest of my life pretending to believe in something that I never believed in. It was as simple and as complicated as that.

  5. If anyone reads the Bible (without Mormon glasses) in a true and objective way, not out of context, You will see that our Lords word does not pass away as the Mormons would have you believe. Just think that the Bible will give you a more personal relationship with our Lord and Savior instead of a Church.

  6. Joshua, I admire what you are doing with your site. Great conversations. I understand I could be wrong on your intentions with this question, but it would seem that you would like to gain knowledge and understanding to become stronger, wiser in your ability to discuss your views. Please don't hear that as criticism. I have heard many testimonies, (not the LDS version of the word), about leaving the Church and it was a painful, long decision. Full of character in their decision. In the way that you pose your question, I would think that you would not draw out most of those that I have described. You have used aggressive words. Demeaning, in a way. Diatribe, for instance. Bunch of anti-mormon literature, for another. Your elevator question is brilliant. I'm just pointing out that for your own purposes of maybe gaining a broader knowledge, draw conversations in with diplomacy.

  7. I had considered becoming a Mormon in the period of my life when I was away from the Bible. Although I never became 'indoctrinated' into the faith, I did consider it. I don't go into any choice on a whim, and spent months studying the books which the Mormon missionaries gave me, as well as the history of the LDS church.

    There were a number of factors which caused me not to join the LDS church: the mention of cattle in America in the BoM (when no evidence has been found), the belief that we can one day become like God (contrary to Isaiah 55:8), the works-based salvation (making it so that our salvation is through our merit, not God's), et al. However, the final nail in the coffin, as it were, was Alma 7:10.

    I wish a lot of Christians were more enthusiastic about fulfilling the Great Commission, but the heart has to be right first. While I respect the dedication and faith of the LDS church, I cannot ascribe to their beliefs with an honest heart.

  8. the underpants

  9. I was a member of the Church. It has taken me many years and a knowledge of many other world religions to crystallise in my mind what was wrong with it. The indoctrination in the LDS church is exactly the same as the indoctrination that takes place in all other religions. It is a form of brainwashing which leads to a totally illogical acceptance of the church dogma despite the obvious arbitrary nature of "blessings" and the endless manipulation that is required to reconcile the dogma with contradictory evidence. The invariable conclusion that is drawn when there are no plausible answers is that this is a a meant to be "Trial of Faith" and is therefore indisputable ( thus closing any opportunity for rational debate) or that the Church is perfect but the members are weak. This is so lame and totally inconsistent with the what one would expect if the religion (or any religion) was truly divinely inspired. In reality organized religion diminishes the probability of spiritual enlightenment because the focus of all religion invariably moves away from spiritual awareness to a focus on rules and regulations regulating behaviors (Judaism, Islam, LDS, Parsee etc etc etc)

    • As a recent convert to The LDS Church I can say that no "indoctrination" took place in my conversion. I had a spiritual witness of its truth and divinity which was undeniable. The reason I mention this is that I looked for "logical" reasons to disprove this witness because no one raised as a protestant christian wants "mormonism" to be true (trust me, it's a lot easier to think that you can go to heaven by speaking words than actually living a christian life), but it is true and with this divinely attained knowledge I am now damned to have to live the life that God wishes me to live, and the joy and peace that has entered my life because of this knowledge is worth more than the world.

  10. I was born and raised LDS. By the time I was 14, my parents gave me the choice to choose how I wanted to direct my spiritual life. I left. The church and the members tended to use Sundays as the time to see who is faring better, and to placate false sympathy of those in hard times, only to gossip behind their backs. My parents opened our small home to another family who had been victims of flooding in our area back in the early 80's. We ate in the breakfast room which was able to seat their family and ours. Cozy, but nice. The next Sunday, I overheard the mother making claims that they were 'crammed into a little room and not served enough meat.' That lead me to start listening more to what people said before and after services. Their conversations, their actions, most were facades. We heard the criticism of our family having only one child, me. We heard we were too poor and I attended public school. The horror. So when my parents presented the opportunity to choose, I chose to let go of religion and follow my own spirituality. A quote that rang true was, "All institutions created by man, no matter how noble their purpose, end in self-perpetuation". And I find validity in this. why would an immortal being need gold spired superstructures built to worship them? The church, and to a point, most religions, inadvertently (or maybe not so much) perpetuates a sense of need and blinding faith that replaces a void where they may have no strength. I'm not saying LDS is wrong; I'm simply stating that any man-made religion (aka, all of them), are inherently flawed. Their existence, in and of themselves stands in testament to being the antithesis of the love and understanding and faith they preach, as they denounce all other religions (which are all doing the same thing.)

    Also, any religion that asks for money, even suggests it, is going against what Jesus Christ was depicted as. And spending it on such vast facilities is not showing the meek and the humble. The only difference in idolization between the temples and structures and idols depicting a god are simply the materials.

    Many thoughts have been there over the years. I don't regret some of the good things I was taught. I'm honest, upstanding, moral, caring and loving. But I don't regret leaving in the slightest.

  11. Tom you are so full of shit! Not true I have been LDS all my life. I have not seen one inappropriate action ever in my 48 years in the church. just all BULLSHIT !

  12. I do have a question ? I have been to the temple many times and have noticed that the ceremony is almost identical to the free mason ceremony with just a few words changed. Same clothing and etc. Can anyone explain why this is so. I would like just real comments not some sarcastic comments. And Freemason symbols at the SLC temple. I see president Monson doing the Freemason handshake with president Bush.

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